Addicted to Ink

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

ghosts from summers past

This morning when i got a "news alert" from Springfield News & Sun, i quickly deleted it. It was a busy day.

But then Mom forwarded me the same alert, 21 year old drowns in reservoir and this time with a note - "I think this was Candy's brother."

i clicked on the link, hoping it wasn't true.
It was. 21 years old. Dead. Ouch. Nathan, 21, had drowned sunday in the C.J. Brown Reservoir. They're not sure how or why, just that it happened and now he's gone. The kid who loved to spy on his big sister and her friends and was in our 4-H rabbit club (it's true - my rabbits were Scarlett and Rhett) and stay up as late as he could and sneak Mountain Dew and who loved to laugh and +should+ have had many memories yet to make - gone.

Candy was my best friend from junior high and high school. Our last two years of high school, our lives started going in really different directions, and even though we were "best friends" we could be really mean to each other. But in the next coupla years, we grew up and put that behind us. No longer best friends, but friends who still cared about each other and kept in touch once in a while. And it's rare that we do chat, but sometimes it happens. And the one thing that we've always had in common - is that we both have always been crazy about our siblings.

A really weird thing about my past is that it's almost gone. I know, I know - that's the point, the definition, of the past. But for me, it's a little different because not long after I moved away from my hometown for good, my parents did too. So did almost every single other members of my family - or those family members have either 1. died 2. are really close to dying or 3. don't care enough to keep in touch. There are no real things of "then" that are in any way involved with my life now, it seems. There are still relationships, but for the most part, have either disappeared or evolved. My 10 year high school reunion is coming up, and I'm curious, but my only desire to go would be to see how others have 'turned out' and not neccessarily to rekindle friendships. Is that wrong? It just seems so very long ago.

But... even though I have great memories - especially of family members - I'm not nostalgic for the past. I love my life now. Sure there are the bad days, but I have really wonderful people in my life.

And while there's a lot to be desired... yeah. I'm in a good place.

But anyway... if you think of it, please say a prayer for my friend Candy, who's missing her little brother already.

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

i remember him:( That's so horrible....Wow. I find myself thinking about McConkey Road....our house..your school...all of it. It seems like forever ago (even though it's not that far from now...) i remember those crazy fun roads...i remember going to your performances at school...I remember your friends...and how i told candy's sister (i think her sister) that mom HATED workboots...lol! i remember so much and it's sad..b/c it's like..we can never go back there....I, for the first time drove there when brit died last year and took a picture of the house...lol..and court took one of me next to the tree..it's amazing all of the things that happened there. I miss you.

1:03 PM  
Blogger Rachel said...

I'm prone to believe that my so-called "highschool" years happened many lives ago. It all seem so distant. I'm so sorry about your friends brother. That's horrible.

9:18 PM  

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